3Rhyan+S's+Tale+of+Utopia

=Navigation Bar= 3Rhyan S's Home Page 3Rhyan S's Blog Page 3Rhyan S's Tale of Utopia 3Rhyan S's Webquest 3Rhyan S's Animal Farm Page

__My Mini Saga __



The two detectives had just sat down at the table when, the light just turned off and a creaking came up the stairs. When the window blew open and Mimmi the head detective said, hold still we need to find some place where they would not be found. Charlie the new detective found a closet.

The Jail-Breakers By: Rhyan Shultis





 "Hello" said Mimmi. Mimmi was the head detective of the CJD (criminal justice department) she had just received a phone call from the police department and found out that there was a 467 and that she needed to respond quickly and get another member of the CJD with her right away and go investigate. She called the CJD and said she needed back up and quickly they said that Lilly, Charlie, and Victor were in they said that Lilly and Victor could meet her.  Mimmi said, “I would like Charlie to come and meet me".  “Mimmi I think the other two should come Charlie is very inexperienced". “I know, but if he does it he will be more experienced.”  O.K. Mimmi, sergeant Billy said I'll send him right over" "Thank you" Mimmi said and hung up. She got the Fax and read all about were they were going. Then Charlie showed up and said,  “Hey Mimmi, thank you so much for choosing me to come with you."  “No problem" Mimmi said “but we have to leave right now."

 "OK where are we going" Charlie asked curiously. "We are going to what is supposedly an abandoned warehouse." "OK what is this case about?" "Well, a series of breakouts at the jail are happening. And a group of men are working together to steal and breakout of prison" “ Oh that is not good.” Charlie said. "I'm glad I chose you." “You mean that?” Charlie said with a shocked look on his face. “Yes I mean that, I chose you because you were new and you wouldn’t be scared, the newbie’s are never scared. But when they get used to the business they get very scared. That’s why I am the head detective I don’t get scared like the others do” said Mimmi. “That’s pretty neat” said Charlie with a impressed look on his face. Mimmi smirked she thought that Charlie is a pretty cool kid. They were driving down a country road They came to the warehouse. It was old and boarded up. There were people there, the only way they new people were inside was because there was about 15 cars outside. Mimmi said <span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman',Times,serif; font-size: 130%;">“I think we will drive about a quarter mile away and walk just because they might see our car and figure out what is happening. Is that ok with you Charlie?” <span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman',Times,serif; font-size: 130%;">“Yeah that seems like a good idea, can I share a thought?” Charlie asked. <span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman',Times,serif; font-size: 130%;">“Of course all ideas are good ideas” Mimmi said. <span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman',Times,serif; font-size: 130%;">"Well if we take that road right there we can drive around back and” they walk around back and saw that there was a back door. “we could sneak right through the door!” <span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman',Times,serif; font-size: 130%;">“That would be a brilliant idea” Mimmi said with enthusiasm.

<span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman',Times,serif; font-size: 130%;"> They got back in the car took the route that Charlie suggested, he seemed very pleased with himself. They got out of the car and went to the back door and Mimmi opened it a crack she could hear voices but they seemed to have come from another room they opened the door. They went inside. Mimmi whispered in Charlie’s ear that they have to be extremely quiet. He nodded and understood. They looked around the room and all there was, was a old trunk. They walked over to the door and listened the voices were muffled but they could make out what they were saying.

<span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman',Times,serif; font-size: 130%;">“But Jones we gotta break Josey outta jail” <span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman',Times,serif; font-size: 130%;">“I don’t think we will be able to” said Jones. <span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman',Times,serif; font-size: 130%;">“But Jones” <span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman',Times,serif; font-size: 130%;">“But what.” said Jones. “He ain’t worth it." Jones said in a rough voice. <span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman',Times,serif; font-size: 130%;">"We gotta talk about the next robbery its gunna be at Magneto’s jewelry shop” said Jones. <span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman',Times,serif; font-size: 130%;"> “Palwinn and Jenkins are gunna do that business." <span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman',Times,serif; font-size: 130%;">Mimmi had the door open a crack and had noticed that all of the men in there had looked at Palwinn and Jenkins. <span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman',Times,serif; font-size: 130%;">She closed the door and gestured that they should leave. They walked out and in they car they both agree to meet there at 5:00am in the morning. So they drove the rest of the way in silence, they both were thinking about the conversation they had just heard. When Mimmi arrived home she crawled into bed and set her alarm for 3:30 am the next morning.

<span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman',Times,serif; font-size: 130%;"> The next day she called the CJD and said to have police officers at Magneto’s jewelry shop, and to have officers to come to the warehouse at 2:15 pm if they hadn’t heard from them before then. Mimmi drove and went to the warehouse she found Charlie They opened the door and went in. They went through the doors and examined the warehouse they went in what seemed to be a storage room and then jumped back because Jones was in there, he grabbed them. He locked them up in an upstairs room gagged. At 2:00 they woke up in the meeting room surrounded by the criminals Jones was there too. Then one of the criminals said, <span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman',Times,serif; font-size: 130%;">"You caught the men who were robbing they jewelery shop." They were soon interrupted by the police. They caught all the criminals including Jones. The head deputy came up to Charlie and said <span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman',Times,serif; font-size: 130%;">“Good job newbie.” Charlie’s response was <span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman',Times,serif; font-size: 130%;">“I will work harder”. <span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman',Times,serif; font-size: 130%;"> **~The End~**

<span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS',cursive;">MIDDLE _ BEGINNING _ END Work Sheet

<span style="background-color: #ffffff; color: #000000; font-family: 'Comic Sans MS',cursive;"> I introduce the problem and characters || * <span style="background-color: #ffffff; color: #000000; font-family: 'Comic Sans MS',cursive;">Introduce your characters: Detective Mimmi and Charlie, bad guys, dogs, police
 * <span style="background-color: #ffffff; color: #000000; font-family: 'Comic Sans MS',cursive;">Describe the start of your story.


 * <span style="background-color: #ffffff; color: #000000; font-family: 'Comic Sans MS',cursive;">What do they want? to solve crimes

<span style="background-color: #ffffff; color: #000000; font-family: 'Comic Sans MS',cursive;">they get all rapped up with the bad guys and get hurt || * <span style="background-color: #ffffff; color: #000000; font-family: 'Comic Sans MS',cursive;">How will all your story and characters develop?
 * <span style="background-color: #ffffff; color: #000000; font-family: 'Comic Sans MS',cursive;">Where are they going? to the warehouse and taking professor Jones to jail and stopping their group ||
 * <span style="background-color: #ffffff; color: #000000; font-family: 'Comic Sans MS',cursive;">What happens in the middle of your story?
 * by hearing about the breakouts and robberies.


 * <span style="background-color: #ffffff; color: #000000; font-family: 'Comic Sans MS',cursive;">Plot Twists and Turns? they get kidnapped by the criminals


 * <span style="background-color: #ffffff; color: #000000; font-family: 'Comic Sans MS',cursive;">How will you lead up to the climax? they are stuck in the bad guys ware house ||
 * <span style="background-color: #ffffff; color: #000000; font-family: 'Comic Sans MS',cursive;">Outline the climax...How does the story end? the bad guys go to jail || * <span style="background-color: #ffffff; color: #000000; font-family: 'Comic Sans MS',cursive;">Is your ending what your readers are expecting? yes and no all at the same time


 * <span style="background-color: #ffffff; color: #000000; font-family: 'Comic Sans MS',cursive;">Have you used foreshadowing throughout your story ||